Sunday, March 22, 2009

well. 9 more posts away from a milestone 700. i bet i ll go, freaking hell, i used to sound like an idiot [some of u might still think so] if i read my first post from way back then.

anyway. i woke up earlier today to rescue the newspapers from those hu either neglect the rules or those hu are just freaking kiasu or both. anyways. i shall exercise my lame ass duty clerk authority if these companies try to smoke a second copy off me later. cus nothing escapes my eyes even tho newspapers every weekend are probably as scarce as water in the dessert. if u find it, u ll rush for it and u ll be in paradise [what?!?! believe me, i dont know why i just made such a lame ass comparison but its morning on a sunday, i hope u understand, haha], if you dont, ur condemned to an afternoon of boredom [well, or u could always bid ur time doing something else, cheers, we all know u ll live]

ok back to the blog. so i was done setting up barricades in front of my newspapers [i wish i had the luxury of doing a stoke city, put 10 men in front of wad i m defending, but they ll all probably turn around and grab the papers themselves anyway], so this is the time where i ll either have the red pill of being rightfully anal or the blue pill of hiding in my own little world called the COPA office.

yes and once again, back to the blog. i was fbing this morning. and i saw commissioning photos of some of my frens. and i came to wonder as i drew the S1 office key. wad the hell m i doing here. i mean like, my fellow council EXCO member, a house captain [would probably find afew more if i decided to extend my fbing hours] passing out of OCS. i considered each of them my equal during school. then thoughts like 'yea, i didnt make it cus i got my knee injury right.' well my spec told me i might have made it to sispec, but was that good enough for me? i thought 'yea, didnt the doctor say that if he sent an injured person to command school, they would kill him for not doing an accurate assessment of my injury.' but he didnt directly tell me that he failed me during that ffi, and that doesnt explain how i got posted to an engineer unit either right. so then, m i making excuses for my supposed failure and disappointment?

then another thought came, 'but haven't u made the best out of ur situation?' i would say yes, and i truly and sincerely thank God for turning my disappointment into this new appointment. but i just felt, why must i rely on God and rely on myself to make the most out of second best, when the best always just seems to be a top up of a little more effort and a little more faith...

things dont happen cus they happen, only shit happens cus it happens, things happen cus we make them happen, shit happens to help us tell the difference and ultimately make the difference...

anyway. i was wiki-ing the matrix last night. the more i read, the more i understood cus i never saw reloaded before. i think its a really deep, really goes beyond the surface kinda storyline. sorry for the lack of good vocabulary. limitations to my verbosity and add the fact i m sleepy. but wadever it is, i think the movie suits insightful, probing characters like me. then again, thats wad my last literature teacher said. my grades proved otherwise. first class potential, second best results...

|cowpoo| 7:20 AM|

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